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Heads You Tear Apart from the Inside, Tales You Survive By; the Sheer Luck of It! (Demo)

by Leonardo Lemuel

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1.
Mortality 03:10
In time all your friends will die and you will be alone. They say, "Well you know, you might ascend," or so you are told. Sometimes it's just the end that's on your mind from the comforts of your home. You're growing so very old. The only certain thing is you're dying one day at a time. The days just come and go, till you don't know where you are any more. Your mind runs sanguine sweet, as your words escape your sheets. Your very soul is leaking out. It's a force that just depletes, from the pit of your conceit, and you're not faking it no more.
2.
Sudden Death 02:48
It's a shock to the system. It's a truth that you must face. The person you knew is gone. So much for tribute songs! They can never be replaced. It's a black day on your calendar. How many moons since the last one? Was it weeks or maybe years? You'll be engaged with all your fears till funeral bells eclipse the Sun. It's just another sudden death. It's just another sudden death. another sudden death. It's just another sudden death. It's a natural occurrence coming at high frequency. You're trying to tune it out, but your dial's stuck in place. It's all that you can see. It goes out with your ego, with your complacency. With your brain against the wall, you'll be picking up the pieces for the next couple of weeks It's just another sudden death. It's just another sudden death. another sudden death. It's just another sudden death weighing on your conscience.
3.
Years are racing by. I can't keep up with all these changes. I'm lost in place, and in time. And I still feel like I did yesterday. I feel as old as I did yesterday. I'm losing speed. I'm growing faster now. I really outta act my age, but I feel as old as I already did yesterday. I feel as old as I already did yesterday. It's a slow growth to your grave... It's the progression to nothing... It's the slow descent into madness... It's the miracle of age. And I still feel like I did yesterday. I feel as old as I already did yesterday. Yesterday... Yesterday... Yesterday...
4.
City Rats 02:52
You and I are city rats. We keep the country running on our backs. Working pointless jobs in our pointless lives. We're all living in our city flats, paying double on our council tax, so we can grease these gears, and just to watch them turn. And everything we need is cheap. All the people that we meet are cheap, and they just come and go, and we all look the same. And whenever I'm feeling alone, I can tap on a telephone to talk to strangers who don't care to know my name. You and I were made for more than pushing pencils and keeping the score. Working 9 to 5, and just to stay alive! Let's make a business of you and me, refract the blindness till we can see. pushing through the crowds that just stare back through you. We can trade coffee and jokes. We can laugh till we choke. Breathing poison air from all that city haze. And I can lie down with you, till our limbs turn cold and blue. Oh, what a wonderful way for us to waste our days!
5.
College 03:11
Your days are passing by, and you don't even care. You stare in the mirror and straighten up your hair so you can leave at night and fuck a bunch of guys. You live a wasted life. But your sadness grows with every passing day till you can't stay away from how you're feeling. Reeling suitors close, Twisting, shooting in the dark, Stark ejaculations spring, "are you really happy!?" Your hours are passing on, and on, and on, let's write another song, "oh the government is wrong," "oh well we don't get along." I don't think we ever did. I'll be happy when you're gone. Have you ever thought for a day in your life, or did you just recite all your notes and stories? Ideals burn too bright, you're terrified at the sight! You have no will to fight for your hope and glory. The minutes ticking on you're imprisoned by your books and all those curious looks from those lecturers and crooks. who have tricked you into debt, with pretentious intellect, lesson learned, now don't forget! To what degree will you turn, with all your papers burned? Smeared in ashes; sackcloth spurned, "There's no job for Jobs now!" Your thesaurus guides you through, blue collar services, and now you're sure you lived, only as they taught you. Drop out! Drop out! Drop out now! Drop out now!
6.
The modern world is not my home: a horse without a rider. Slowly racing into the end of days, it's like a living nightmare. When I wake the dream comes true, and when I wake the dream comes true, and when I wake I scream. And so we stand on the precipice, where we define our being. I squander my days in avarice, trying to find some meaning. When I wake the dream comes true, and when I wake the dream comes true, and when I wake I scream. I'll ride the tiger through the cycles of the Earth. Turn the snake back on itself, watch it bury its head deep. And as St. John looks on, I'll usher in the days! I'll battle Ragnarok, then ride upon the waves! And when I dream, it's coming soon... And when I dream, it's coming soon... And when I dream, it's coming soon... And when I dream...
7.
There's so much to live for, so much to see! I'll never get bored. I just want to be anything at all, so why not this? Sometimes we fall... Sometimes it's bliss... So where's my key to happiness? You hold on to me? Well hold to this. We can sit and talk, and reminisce. Cast our worries off and never miss each other. Well, not the bad times... Unforgiven sins from you or me are liquidated in the memories. Captured perfectly; locked in time. Lost in endless dreams; expressed in rhyme. And all my friends are here with me. The moments never end, they just repeat. You cannot pretend it's all defeat. Maybe in the end we can meet in that city. I hope you make it... It's never make believe, but it's all in the way you perceive and where you've been. What you've done or said is dead and gone. The whole world's in your head, so just live on. And time, it never stops for anyone. It cares not for the drop or rise of sun, and retroactive thought's a smoking gun. So forget what you're taught, and be the one...
8.
Stand As One 03:19
As you cross your heart and hope to die you're spitting in your brother's eye. A holy nation, filled with pride, stands firmly on a genocide. "What we believe is now your truth..." In culture wars we always lose! Misguided men and their abuse prevail till we shout from the roofs: "We're all the same!" We're all the same way. "We're all the same!" We're all the same way. "We're all the same!" We're all the same way. "We're all the same!" We're all the same way. My name, my face, my skin, or creed they're no reasons to make me bleed. Sectarian identities prolong and breed idolatry, so why wallow in the baseless hate? It's time you finally concentrate. To classify was our mistake. Reject the lies, reiterate: "We're all the same!" We're all the same way. "We're all the same!" We're all the same way. "We're all the same!" We're all the same way. "We're all the same!" We're all the same way. Suddenly we all stand as one when we have no race to run. Suddenly we all stand as one when we have no race to run. Suddenly we all stand as one when we have no race to run.

about

This album is the second demo for Leonardo Lemuel, a music project started by Andrew Wray.

This album is all about death, depression, anger, sadness, and transformation, among other things.

You don't have to pay anything for this, but you can donate if you're feeling generous. Proceeds will be used to fund further music production, etc.

credits

released February 16, 2020

All songs and artwork written, performed, produced, etc. by Andrew Wray.

Special thanks to Romilla Mistry, for her patience, kindness, and her help with setting up my equipment.

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Leonardo Lemuel Bristol, UK

Demanding Emo in Bristol. Pouring out words over guitar.

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